


Like They Do On the Discovery Channel

by SecretMaker



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-20
Updated: 2015-10-20
Packaged: 2018-04-27 06:05:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,053
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5036680
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SecretMaker/pseuds/SecretMaker
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>headcanon that whenever kageyama follows kenma around, kuroo and bokuto get it on video and narrate it like a nature documentary<br/>-chm00kie (Tumblr)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Like They Do On the Discovery Channel

8-28-15  
Prompt: (<a href="http://chm00kie.tumblr.com/post/131254244685/headcanon-that-whenever-kageyama-follows-kenma">x</a>)  
Pairing: KageKen  
Rating: G  
  
“Here we can see the Angry Blueberry in his natural-”  
  
“Bro, are we really calling him an angry blueberry?”  
  
“Yeah, man, you said-”  
  
“I was joking. We need to come up with a better name than that.”  
  
“I thought it was pretty cool…”  
  
“Nah, bro, it was cool. It’s just too much. We don’t want to overpower people with how fucking hilarious we are.”  
  
Kenma slapped a hand over his forehead. Kuroo and Bokuto had been squabbling over Kuroo’s laptop for the last hour, using the breaks in between to narrate what they claimed would be the most groundbreaking film ever released. So far all he had seen was a blurry shot of the third gymnasium and a closeup of… he was pretty sure that was Bokuto’s nose. Not really award-winning stuff.  
  
He tuned them out as they started actually editing the thing. Years of practice had made Kenma adept at ignoring Kuroo, and Bokuto was just one more step in that process. He managed to completely lose himself in his game within moments.  
  
It wasn’t until almost an hour later, when the battery warning started blinking on his POP that he emerged. The charging cord was on the desk next to Kuroo’s elbow, so Kenma untangled himself from his nest of blankets and padded over. He glanced lazily at the computer, then stopped in his tracks.  
  
Kageyama was on the screen, filmed from a cross the gym. He was staring off to the right, where Kenma could just see himself, setting a ball to Shouyou.  
  
Kenma could feel his cheeks going warm at the intense look on his face.  
  
“Though seemingly unnoticed by his target, the Kagledon remains hopeful.” Bokuto’s voice droned through the speaker, a perfect imitation of a nature documentary. “He decides that he must step up his game, and moves on to the first rituals of courtship.”  
  
Kenma watched as the Kageyama on screen stepped toward him, his face going red and his mouth opening as if he were about to say something. His mouth snapped closed and he turned and stormed away. The video cut to a series of different angles, depicting Kageyama walking up behind Kenma time and again, but leaving before he said a word.  
  
“The Kagledon is thus far unsuccessful in approaching his target, and it seems it may be too late.” Just as Kageyama looked like he was actually about to say something to Kenma, one hand stretched out as though to touch his shoulder, Shouyou bounced into the screen. Kenma watched himself talk to Shouyou, watched the disappointed look on Kageyama’s face, watched him clench the reaching hand into a fist and slink away.  
  
That was apparently the end of the edited footage, because the screen froze and Kuroo started clicking through clips to find the next piece. Kenma shook his head and grabbed his cord, palming Kuroo’s phone in the process. He wandered back to his blanket den and curled up around the phone, plugging his headphones in for cover. He opened Kuroo’s camera app and almost sighed aloud in relief when he saw that the raw footage was all still there.  
  
They had apparently been doing this throughout the entire training camp. There were a couple hours of footage here, all different shots of Kageyama and himself. Kenma watched with a growing blush as Kageyama grew bolder, actually managing to speak. He remembered that moment; he had finally noticed Kageyama glaring at him earlier that day, and had been especially tense. When Kageyama had all but shouted a compliment on his setup, Kenma had startled and bolted from the gym. He groaned at the thought. Bokuto and Kuroo were going to have a field day with that.  
  
It got worse from there.  
  
Kenma had spent the last two days of the training camp avoiding Kageyama and his death glare. He wasn’t good with people in general, let alone people he had heard so many good things about. Shouyou may never admit it to himself, but Kenma knew how much the little spiker admired him. Kenma did too; he was an excellent setter, and he was clearly passionate about the game. Having all that intensity aimed at him had been… uncomfortable at best. At worse it made Kenma’s heart beat too fast from delight and terror simultaneously.  
  
Kenma reached the last video on the phone and took a steadying breath before he pressed play.  
  
“Yama-yama-kun, you look scary,” Shouyou was saying from somewhere just off-camera. Kageyama didn’t answer. He was too busy staring across the gym. It was his expression that caught Kenma’s attention. He looked sad. He looked like a boy who was so, so alone, and so angry with himself for being unable to change that. It was a look Kenma knew well; he had seen it in the mirror more times than he cared to remember. He took out his headphones and set the phone down, listening to Kuroo and Bokuto with a growing sensation of nausea. He dug out his own phone.  
  
ME: [You have Kageyama’s number right]  
  
SHOUYOU: [Yep!!!!! Why do you need it?????]  
  
ME: [I need to apologize.]  
  
SHOUYOU: [What for????? Dont apologize to Kageyama he’s mean!!!!!!]  
  
Kenma smiled at his friend’s excitement.  
  
ME: [For one thing, the video Bokuto and Kuro are making.]  
  
SHOUYOU: [???????]  
  
ME: [You’ll find out. Number?]  
  
Shouyou forwarded him Kageyama’s contact information, and Kenma saved it in his phone. He took a deep breath and opened a new message thread.  
  
ME: [This is Kozume Kenma from Nekoma. I need to talk to you.]  
  
KAGEYAMA: [kozume san? what do you need?]  
  
ME: [Are you free this weekend?]  
  
ME: [We should get coffee.]  
  
  
  
When the video went viral a week later, Kenma was more grateful than he could say that he had gotten to Kageyama first. They sat together on Kageyama’s bed and watched the thing over and over, commenting on the horrible camera work, the trite dialog, and and all the dumb things Shouyou and Lev were doing in the background. Kenma was sitting between Kageyama’s legs, his back nestled against Kageyama’s chest, Kageyama’s chin on his shoulder, and a lightness to his heart that he had not felt in a long, long time. He smiled.

**Author's Note:**

> [Tumblr](http://notsuchasecret.tumblr.com)


End file.
